Our Beasts & Critters

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. (Ann Landers)

There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. (Ben Williams)

A dog is the only thing on Earth that loves you more than he loves himself. (Josh Billings)

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person. (Andy Rooney)

We give dogs time we can spare, space we can spare, and love we can spare. And in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best deal man has ever made. (M. Acklam)

Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies, quite unlike people, who are incapable of pure love and always have to mix love and hate. (Sigmund Freud)

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. (Rita Rudner)

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. (Robert Benchley)

Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. (Franklin P. Jones)

If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to Heaven, and very, very few persons. (James Thurber)

I think dogs are the most amazing creatures; they give unconditional love. For me they are the role model for being alive. (Gilda Radner)

If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise.

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. (Robert A. Heinlein

Ever consider what our dogs must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul - chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on Earth! (Anne Tyler)

My goal in life is to be as good of a person as my dog already thinks I am.

Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function.

If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then giving Fido only two of them. (Phil Pastoret)

Dogs are not our whole lives, but they make our lives whole. (Roger Caras)

If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die, I want to go where they went. (Will Rogers)

Compassion for animals is intimately connected with goodness of character; and it may be confidently asserted that he who is cruel to animals cannot be a good man. (Schopenhauer)

“If you are a host to your guest, be a host to his dog also.” – Russian Proverb

“Whoever said you can’t buy happiness forgot about puppies.” -Gene Hill

TO ALL NON-PET OWNERS WHO VISIT AND LIKE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT OUR PETS:

(1) They live here. You don't.

(2) If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. That's why they call it 'fur'-niture.

(3) I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.

(4) To you, they are animals. To me, they are adopted sons/daughters who are short, hairy, walk on all fours and don't speak clearly.

Remember, dogs and cats are better than kids because they:

(1) eat less,

(2) don't ask for money all the time,

(3) are easier to train,

(4) normally come when called,

(5) never ask to drive the car,

(6) don't hang out with drug-using people;

(7) don't smoke or drink,

(8) don't want to wear your clothes,

(9) don't have to buy the latest fashions,

(10) don't need a gazillion dollars for college and

(11) if they get pregnant, you can sell their children

Lessons Learned From My Dog:

1. When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.

2. Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.

3. When it's in your best interest, practice obedience.

4. Let others know when they've invaded your territory.

5. Take naps, and stretch before rising.

6. Run, romp, and play daily.

7. Thrive on attention and let people touch you.

8. Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.

9. On hot days, drink lots of water and lay under a shady tree.

10. When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body.

11. No matter how often or severely you're scolded, don't feel guilty and pout... run right back and make friends.

12. Eat with gusto and enthusiasm. Stop when you have had enough.

13. Delight in the simple joys of a long walk.

14. Be loyal.

15. If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it, wherever that leads you.

16. When a person you love is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by, and nuzzle them gently.