Faith (Christianity)

I would rather live my life as if there is a God and die to find out there isn't, than live my life as if there isn't and die to find out there is. (Albert Camus)

Let your religion be less of a theory and more of a love affair. (Gilbert K. Chesterton)

We are punished by our sins, not for them. (Elbert Hubbard)

Don't fall into the trap of using the Lord's blessings to get what you want.  Instead you must use his blessings to get what He wants you to have.

Call those things that be not as though they were.

All major religious traditions carry basically the same message; that is, love, compassion and forgiveness. The important thing is they should be part of our daily lives. (Dalai Lama)

Disbelief in God usually results in a belief in anything.

Men add and subtract; the Devil divides; but God multiplies!

Sorrow looks backward; Ambition looks forward; Faith looks upward.

The Will of God will not take you to where the Grace of God will not protect you.

Man's way leads to a hopeless end; God's way leads to an endless hope.

I believe in Christianity as I believe the sun has risen; not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else. (C.S. Lewis)

Faith is like homework - all the answers to your questions are there, but you have to read the Book to find them!

To love another person is to help them love God. (Soren Kierkegaard)

A man who was completely innocent, offered himself as a sacrifice for the good of others, including his enemies, and becames the ransom of the world. It was a perfect act. (Mohandas Gandhi)

I myself do nothing. The Holy Spirit accomplishes all through me. (William Blake)

Human beings must be known to be loved, but [God] must be loved to be known. (Pascal)

Faith is believing what God says simply because it is God who says it.

A faith is something you die for; a doctrine is something you kill for: there is all the difference in the world. (Tony Benn)

When fear knocks at your door, let faith open it.

Anyone can count the seeds in an apple, but only God can count the apples in the seed. (Marilyn vos Savant)

Jesus invested His life in you. Have you shown any interest?

I know God won't give me anything I can't handle; I just with He didn't trust me so much. (Mother Teresa)

Live in such a way that those who know you but don't know God will come to know God because they know you.

Religion is Man's way of reaching toward God.  Jesus is God's way of reaching for Man.

God is like the Sun - you cannot look at it, but without it you cannot look at anything else. (Dr. Ravi Zacharias)

Faith is your belief in God; Grace is God's belief in you.

I want to live as though Jesus died for me yesterday, rose this morning, and is coming again tomorrow. (Priceless, Dave Ramsey)

Expect SUDDENLY to happen in your life.

Got wants spiritual fruits, not religious nuts.

The Bible is endorsed by the ages; our civilization is built upon its words. In no other book is there such a collection of inspired wisdom, reality, and hope. (Dwight D. Eisenhower)

God can turn a "breakdown" into a "breakthrough."

God gave us a Bible and a brain, and He expects us to use both.

Repentence is essentially being sorry enough for sinning that you quit sinning.

Many Christians suffer from loneliness because they are sitting instead of serving. (Croft M. Pentz)

You can preach a better sermon with your life than with your lips.

Your life may be the only Bible some people ever read.

You know, religions are like cars. Some are old, some are new. They come in different makes, models and colors. But if you choose to go, they all take you down the same road to God -- whatever name you call him (or her) when you get there. They're just vehicles to Divinity. (Anonymous Jewish Woman)

The best place to keep your Bible is in your heart.

The Ten Commandments are not multiple choice.

Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you a mechanic.

If a man's Bible is coming apart, it is an indication that he himself is fairly well put together. (James Jennings)

Science without religion is lame; religion without science is blind. (Albert Einstein)

God not only plays dice. He also sometimes throws the dice where they cannot be seen.( Stephen Hawking)

To love another person is to help them love God. (Soren Kierkegaard)

This is the day which the Lord has made; we will rejoice and be glad in it. (Psalms 118:24)

Faith makes us sure of what we hope for and gives us proof of what we cannot see. (Hebrews 11:1)

If you willingly obey Him, the best of everything will be yours. (Isaiah 1:19)

The Fool has said in his heart, "There is no God." (Psalms 14:1)

The Thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it more abundantly. (John 10:10)

Keep your mind on whatever is true, pure, right, holy, friendly, and proper. Don't ever stop thinking about what is truly worthwhile and worthy of praise. (Phil 4:8)

Blessed are you when people hate you, avoid you, insult you and slander you because you are committed to the Son of Man....  You have a great reward in heaven.  (Luke 6:22-23)

For I am not ashamed of the good news of Christ. (Romans 1:16)

I won't be stressed because I'm blessed.

If your life is going to waste, Jesus can recycle it.

The Big Bang Theory: God spoke and BANG - It happened.

Jesus: Don't leave Earth without Him.

Eternity: Smoking or Non-smoking?

Don't let the car fool you, my treasures are stored in Heaven.

No Jesus, No Peace

Know Jesus, Know Peace

If you're living like there is no God, you'd better be right.

If you were accused of being a Christian,

would there be enough evidence to convict you?

Life is short. Pray hard.

Be like a window, let the SON shine through

Once I asked God how much he loves me...

Jesus said "This much," then he stretched out his arms and died.

If God is your co-pilot, change seats

Good Morning! This is God.

I will be handling all your problems today.

I will not need your help. So have a nice day.

Why Worry? God's In Control

Real Men Love Jesus

In Case of Rapture, Car's Yours!

This Car is Prayer-Conditioned

Life is NOT an Emergency... SO RELAX

God Answers Knee-Mail

Give God what's right -- not what's left.

Man's way leads to a hopeless end.

God's way leads to an endless hope.

Don't wait for six strong men to take you to church.

We don't change God's message, His message changes us.

God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called.

Read the Bible. It will scare the Hell out of you.

P.U.S.H. - Pray Until Something Happens

F.B.I. - Firm Believer In Christ

D.O.G. - Depend On God

F.R.O.G. - Fully Rely On God

W.W.J.D. - What Would Jesus Do?

Love & Romance

For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul. (Judy Garland)

So these three things remain:  Faith, Hope, and Love.  But the best one of these is Love. (1 Cor 13:13)

Only choose in marriage a man whom you would choose as a friend if he were a woman. (Joseph Joubert)

Christ died because of Sin; He rose because of Love.

Love is more important than anything else. (Coloss 3:14)

A lot of people wonder how you know if you're really in love. Just ask yourself this one question: "Would I mind being  destroyed financially by this person?"

Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties

My wife Mary and I have been married for forty-seven years and not once have we had an argument serious enough to consider divorce; murder, yes, but divorce, never. (Jack Benny)

It is a risk to love. 
What if it doesn't work out?
Ah, but what if it does...
(Peter McWilliams)

Our goodness derives not from our capacity to think but to love. (St. Teresa of Avila)

If I am pressed to say why I loved him, I feel it can only be explained by replying: 'Because it was he; because it was me.' (Montaigne)

My soul is so knit to yours that it is but a divided life I live without you. (George Eliot)

I learnt a long time ago that the only people who count in any marriage are the two that are in it. (Hillary Rodham Clinton)

Chains do not hold a marriage together. It is threads, hundreds of tiny threads which sew people together through the years. That is what makes a marriage last - more than passion or even sex! (Simone Signoret)

Love is the joy of the good, the wonder of the wise, the amazement of the Gods. (Plato)

Men who treat women as helpless and charming playthings deserve women who treat men as delightful and generous bank accounts. (Priceless, Dave Ramsey)

Love doesn't make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile. (Franklin P. Jones)

At the center of non-violence stands the principle of love. (Martin Luther King, Jr.)

Marriage is a lot like the army; everyone complains, but you'd be surprised at the large number that reenlist. (James Garner)

A man is only as old as the woman he feels. (Groucho Marx)

The sound of a kiss is not so loud as that of a cannon, but its echo lasts a great deal longer. (Oliver Wendell Holmes)

Even when there's snow on the roof, there may be a fire in the furnace.

To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world. (Bill Wilson)

Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century. (Mark Twain)

Men of quality are not afraid of women for equality.

Don't cry for a man who's left you - the next one may fall for your smile. (Mae West)

If you cry because the sun has gone out of your life, your tears will prevent you from seeing the stars.

All real love stories must end with "happily ever after."

Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your heart or burn down your house, you can never tell. (Joan Crawford  )

Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love. I'd stepped in it a few times.

A small house can hold as much love as a big one.

I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox. (Woody Allen)

A husband who thinks he's smarter than his wife is married to a very smart woman.

If you seek a model husband, be sure he's a working model.

A good marriage requires a determination to be married for good.

Romance is cooking a gourmet meal for your wife. Love is washing the dishes afterward.

Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind. (William Shakespeare, A Midsummer Night's Dream)

Immature love says "I love you because I need you." Mature love says "I need you because I love you."

Love is being willing to say you're sorry, first.

O, 'tis love, 'tis love, that makes the world go round! (Lewis Carroll, Alice's Adventures in Wonderland)

On any disagreement, the husband should be entitled to the last few words. And those words are "Yes, dear."

Marriage is an exercise that works every muscle in the human spirit.

I love you not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you. I love you not only for what you have made of yourself, but for what you are making of me. I love you for the part of me that you bring out. (Elizabeth Barrett Browning)

Love wasn't put into your heart to stay. Love isn't love until you give it away. (Michael W. Smith)

Love is the irresistible desire to be desired irresistibly. (Louis Ginsberg)

Now you will feel no rain, for each of you will be shelter to the other... Now you are but two persons, but there is one life before you. (Traditional Apache Wedding Blessing)

I ran up the door, closed the stairs,

said my pajamas and put on my prayers,

turned off my bed, and jumped into the light...

all because you kissed me goodnight.

We can do no great things - only small things with great love. (Mother Theresa)

The measure of love is to love without measure.

In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce. The trick is to find, and continue to find, grounds for marriage. (Robert Anderson)

Don't marry the person you think you can live with; marry only the individual you think you can't live without. (Dr. James C. Dobson)

More marriages might survive if the partners realized that sometimes the better comes after the worse. (Doug Larson)

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains because the average man can see better than he can think.

Choose your life's mate carefully. From this one decision will come ninety percent of all your happiness or misery. (Jackson Brown, Jr.)

Judge your success by the happiness of your wife and the respect given to you by your children.

Never forget the nine most important words of any marriage: "I love you," "You are beautiful," and "Please forgive me."

Men are like fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it's our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd like to have dinner with.

I think the bottom-line difference between being single and married is this: When you're single, you're happy as you are. When you're married, you can only be as happy as the least happy person in the apartment. (Tom Hertz)

Face powder may win a husband, but it takes baking powder to keep him.

This is the reason we were made

To know the love of our Creator

And to give the love He's given us away

(Steven Curtis Chapman, All About Love)

When choosing a man to date, always consider whether this is the kind of man you would like to marry. If he isn't potential marriage material, you shouldn't be dating him. (my Mom)

Some pray to marry the man they love,

My prayer will somewhat vary:

I humbly pray to Heaven above

That I love the man I marry.

(Rose Pastor Stokes, "My Prayer")

Love is friendship set on fire.

Sex appeal is fifty percent what you've got, and fifty percent what people think you've got. (Sophia Loren)

There is only one happiness in life, to love and be loved. (George Sand)

The first marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. The second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience. The third marriage is the triumph of stupidity.

A poll shows women think men are sexiest playing football. And they're at their least sexy watching football. (Jay Leno)

A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies.... She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. (Proverbs 10, 25)

A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous. (Ingrid Bergman)

There is no sight on Earth more appealing than the sight of a woman making dinner for someone she loves. (Thomas Wolfe)

I still have two abiding passions; one is my model railway, the other women. But at the age of 90, I find I am getting just a little too old for model railways. (Pierre Monteux, conductor, on turning 90)

I kissed my first girl and smoked my first cigarette on the same day. I haven't had time for tobacco since. (Arturuo Toscanini)

Keep thy eyes wide open before marriage, and half-shut afterwards. (Benjamin Franklin)

A dress makes no sense unless it inspires men to want to take it off you. (Francoise Sagan)

You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection. (Buddha)

The most indispensable ingredient of all good home cooking: love for those you are cooking for. (Sophia Loren)

Do you want me to tell you something really subversive? Love is everything it's cracked up to be. That's why people are so cynical about it. It really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for. And the trouble is, if you don't risk anything, you risk even more. (Erica Jong)

The loveliest faces are to be seen by moonlight, when one sees half with the eye and half with the fancy. (Persian Proverb)

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.

We all want to fall in love. Why? Because that experience makes us feel completely alive. Where every sense is heightened, every emotion is magnified, our everyday reality is shattered and we are flying into the heavens. It may only last a moment, and hour, an afternoon. But that doesn't diminish its value. Because we... are left with memories that we treasure for the rest of our lives. (Unknown)

A man's greatest blessing is a sympathetic wife.

The goal in marriage is not to think alike, but to think together.

The heart of marriage is memories; and if the two of you happen to have the same ones and can savor your reruns, then your marriage is a gift from the gods.  (Bill Cosby)

My wife and I were comparing notes the other day. “I have a higher IQ, did better on my SATs and make more money than you,” she pointed out. “Yeah, but when you step back and look at the big picture, I’m still ahead,” I said. She looked mystified. “I married better,” I replied. (Louis Rodolico, from Reader’s Digest)

Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends. John 15:13

"I ask for so little. Just fear me, love me, do as I say and I will be your slave." Jareth, from the Labyrinth

Whenever you want to marry someone, go have lunch with his ex-wife. (Shelley Winters)

To love, purely and fiercely, without agenda, is the most terrifying and rewarding thing you'll ever do. (Gala Darling)

It takes courage to love, but pain through love is the purifying fire which those who love generously know. We all know people who are so much afraid of pain that they shut themselves up like clams in a shell and, giving out nothing, receive nothing and therefore shrink until life is a mere living death. (Eleanor Roosevelt)

The Difference Between "Men" and "Guys"

-Men know what they want to be doing five years down the road. Guys are not sure what they want to be doing later tonight.

-Men claim to be feminists but still insist on opening doors, driving, and paying for dinner. Guys claim to be feminists so they can let women open doors, drive, and pay for dinner.

-Men are afraid of becoming their fathers. Guys are afraid of becoming men.

-Men order wine based on more than the price. Guys bring their own beer.

Friendship

A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart, and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words.

A friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.

Never waste an opportunity to tell someone you love them.

The perfect friend sees the best in you - sees it constantly - not just when you occasionally are that way, but also when you waver, when you forget yourself, act like less than you are.  In time, you become more like his vision of you - which is the person you have always wanted to be. (Nancy Friday)

People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care. (Dr. John Maxwell)

You cannot touch your neighbor's heart with anything less than your own.

May your home always be too small to hold all of your friends. (Irish Blessing)

Owe no one anything except to love one another, for he who loves another has fulfilled the law. (Romans 13:8)

Don't think that this is a letter. It is only a small eruption of a disease called friendship. (Jean Renoir)

Friendship multiplies our joys and divides our grief.

If you make it plain you like people, it's hard for them to resist liking you back. (Lois McMaster Bujold, Diplomatic Immunity)

Love is, above all, the gift of oneself. (Jean Anouilh)

I set out to find a friend but couldn't find one; I set out to be a friend, and friends were everywhere.

Affection is created by habit, community of interests, convenience, and the desire of companionship. It is a comfort rather than an exhilaration. (W. Somerset Maugham)

It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them. (Ralph Waldo Emerson)

A friend is the one who comes in when the whole world has gone out. (Grace Pulpit)

Friendship is stopping to listen when you have a lot to say.

A true friend will remember your birthday but will forget how many birthdays you've had.

Friendship fills up all those little ruts in life's road.

Treat your friends like family and your family like friends.

A hug is a perfect gift - one size fits all and nobody minds if you give it back.

Be grateful for the doors of opportunity - and for friends who oil the hinges.

No one is rich enough to do without a neighbor. (Danish Proverb)

A friend is one before whom I may think aloud. (Ralph Waldo Emerson)

Be a friend to thyself, and others will be so too. (Thomas Fuller)

There are some people who pass through your life like a butterfly. They rarely make contact and then are quickly gone. There are those who pass through your life as fellow travelers. They sit and talk for awhile on the airplane, but upon touchdown, they drift away toward their own destinations. Then there are people who pass through your life and set up camp. They work with you, share with you, borrow from you, care about you. These are the kind that give meaning to life.

Silences make the real conversations between friends. Not the saying but the never needing to say is what counts. (Margaret Lee Runbeck)

A best friend is a sister that destiny forgot to give you.

Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and you cry with your girlfriends. (Laurie Kuslansky)

True friendship is like sound health; the value of it is seldom known until it is lost. (Charles Caleb Colton)

We are friends and I do like to pass the day with you in serious and inconsequential chatter. I wouldn't mind washing up beside you, dusting beside you, reading the back half of the paper while you read the front. We are friends and I would miss you, do miss you and think of you very often. (Jeanette Winterson)

Strangers are friends just waiting to happen.

Everyone hears what you say. Friends listen to what you say. Best friends listen to what you don't say.

He whose hand is clasped in friendship will not throw mud.

When the character of a man is not clear to you, look at his friends (Japanese Proverb)

No man is an island, entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main. (John Dunne)

"Pooh, promise you won't forget about me, ever. Not even when I'm a hundred." Pooh thought for a little. "How old shall I be then?" "Ninety-nine." Pooh nodded. "I promise," he said. (A. A. Milne, "The House at Pooh Corner")

I cannot even imagine where I would be today were it not for that handful of friends who have given me a heart full of joy. Let's face it, friends make life a lot more fun. (Charles Swindoll)

Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down. (Oprah Winfrey)

The ornament of a house is the guest who frequents it.

A true friend is someone who is there for you when they would rather be someplace else. (Len Wein)

This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. No one has greater love than this, to lay down one's life for one's friends. (John 15:12-13)

Wishing to be friends is quick work, but friendship is a slow-ripening fruit. (Aristotle)

If you have love in your life it can make up for a great many things you lack. If you don't have it, no matter what else there is, it's not enough. (Ann Landers)

My best friend is the one who brings out the best in me. (Henry Ford)

A Simple Friend vs. A Real Friend

A simple friend has never seen you cry. A real friend has shoulders soggy from your tears.

A simple friend doesn't know your parents' first names. A real friend has their phone numbers in her address book.

A simple friend brings a bottle of wine to your party. A real friend comes early to help you cook and stays late to help you clean.

A simple friend hates it when you call after he has gone to bed. A real friend asks you why you took so long to call.

A simple friend seeks to talk with you about your problems. A real friend seeks to help you with your problems.

A simple friend wonders about your romantic history. A real friend could blackmail you with it.

A simple friend, when visiting, acts like a guest. A real friend opens your refrigerator and helps herself.

A simple friend thinks the friendship is over when you have an argument. A real friend calls you after you have a fight.

A simple friend expects you to always be there for them. A real friend expects to always be there for you.

Life is Pain, Highness

Buttercup: You mock my pain!

Dread Pirate Roberts: Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something.

The only pain in pleasure is the pleasure of the pain. (Anne Rice)

Whatever brings you the most joy will also probably bring you the most pain. Always a price to pay. (Alice Hoffman)

How delicious is pleasure after torment! (Pierre Corneille)

The first thing we become convinced of is that man is organized so as to be far more sensible of pain than of pleasure. (Jean Anthelme Brillat-Savarin)

Humor is the instinct for taking pain playfully. (Max Eastman)

It's at the borders of pain and suffering that the men are separated from the boys. (Emil Zatopek)

I think that passion and love and pain are all bearable, and they go to make love beautiful. (Robert Plant)

Many men are deeply moved by the mere semblance of suffering in a woman; they take the look of pain for a sign of constancy or of love. (Honore De Balzac)

The secret of success is learning how to use pain and pleasure instead of having pain and pleasure use you. If you do that, you're in control of your life. If you don't, life controls you. (Tony Robbins)

After great pain, a formal feeling comes. The Nerves sit ceremonious, like tombs. (Emily Dickinson)

There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt. (Erma Bombeck)

Torment, for some men, is a need, an appetite, and an accomplishment. (Emile M. Cioran)

There is no coming to consciousness without pain. (Carl Jung)

Given the choice between the experience of pain and nothing, I would choose pain. (William Faulkner)

To truly laugh, you must be able to take your pain, and play with it! (Charlie Chaplin)

I think about the meaning of pain. Pain is personal. It really belongs to the one feeling it. Probably the only thing that is your own. I like mine. (Henry Rollins)

Sensual excess drives out pity in man. (Marquis de Sade)

There is no more lively sensation than that of pain; its impressions are certain and dependable, they never deceive as may those of the pleasure women perpetually feign and almost never experience. (Marquis de Sade)

The great art of life is sensation, to feel that we exist, even in pain. (Lord Byron)

To give and receive love, you have to be in touch with pain, you have to be capable of provoking it and feeling it. (Jeanne Moreau)

The end is the beginning of all things, Suppressed and hidden, Awaiting to be released through the rhythm Of pain and pleasure. (Jiddu Krishnamurti)

Suffering cheerfully endured, ceases to be suffering and is transmuted into an ineffable joy. (Gandhi)

I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love. (Mother Teresa)

My pain may be the reason for somebody's laugh. But my laugh must never be the reason for somebody's pain. (Charlie Chaplin)

Unfortunately, sometimes people don't hear you until you scream. (Stefanie Powers)

The wish to hurt, the momentary intoxication with pain, is the loophole through which the pervert climbs into the minds of ordinary men. (Jacob Bronowski)

A man who has not passed through the inferno of his passions has never overcome them. (Carl Gustav Jung)

Nothing that can be said can begin to take away the anguish and pain of these moments. Grief is the price we pay for love. (Elizabeth II)

Scars have the power to remind us that our past is real. (Cormac McCarthy)

Anger and agony
Are better than misery
Trust me, I've got a plan
When the lights go off, you will understand
Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
  (Pain, Three Days Grace)

Our Beasts & Critters

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. (Ann Landers)

There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. (Ben Williams)

A dog is the only thing on Earth that loves you more than he loves himself. (Josh Billings)

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person. (Andy Rooney)

We give dogs time we can spare, space we can spare, and love we can spare. And in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best deal man has ever made. (M. Acklam)

Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies, quite unlike people, who are incapable of pure love and always have to mix love and hate. (Sigmund Freud)

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. (Rita Rudner)

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. (Robert Benchley)

Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. (Franklin P. Jones)

If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to Heaven, and very, very few persons. (James Thurber)

I think dogs are the most amazing creatures; they give unconditional love. For me they are the role model for being alive. (Gilda Radner)

If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise.

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. (Robert A. Heinlein

Ever consider what our dogs must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul - chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on Earth! (Anne Tyler)

My goal in life is to be as good of a person as my dog already thinks I am.

Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function.

If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then giving Fido only two of them. (Phil Pastoret)

Dogs are not our whole lives, but they make our lives whole. (Roger Caras)

If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die, I want to go where they went. (Will Rogers)

Compassion for animals is intimately connected with goodness of character; and it may be confidently asserted that he who is cruel to animals cannot be a good man. (Schopenhauer)

“If you are a host to your guest, be a host to his dog also.” – Russian Proverb

“Whoever said you can’t buy happiness forgot about puppies.” -Gene Hill

TO ALL NON-PET OWNERS WHO VISIT AND LIKE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT OUR PETS:

(1) They live here. You don't.

(2) If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. That's why they call it 'fur'-niture.

(3) I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.

(4) To you, they are animals. To me, they are adopted sons/daughters who are short, hairy, walk on all fours and don't speak clearly.

Remember, dogs and cats are better than kids because they:

(1) eat less,

(2) don't ask for money all the time,

(3) are easier to train,

(4) normally come when called,

(5) never ask to drive the car,

(6) don't hang out with drug-using people;

(7) don't smoke or drink,

(8) don't want to wear your clothes,

(9) don't have to buy the latest fashions,

(10) don't need a gazillion dollars for college and

(11) if they get pregnant, you can sell their children

Lessons Learned From My Dog:

1. When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.

2. Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.

3. When it's in your best interest, practice obedience.

4. Let others know when they've invaded your territory.

5. Take naps, and stretch before rising.

6. Run, romp, and play daily.

7. Thrive on attention and let people touch you.

8. Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.

9. On hot days, drink lots of water and lay under a shady tree.

10. When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body.

11. No matter how often or severely you're scolded, don't feel guilty and pout... run right back and make friends.

12. Eat with gusto and enthusiasm. Stop when you have had enough.

13. Delight in the simple joys of a long walk.

14. Be loyal.

15. If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it, wherever that leads you.

16. When a person you love is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by, and nuzzle them gently.

On Being Successful

Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, magic, and power in it. Begin it now. (Johann Worfgang von Goethe)

Consider the postage stamp:  its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there. (Josh Billings)

Eighty percent of success is showing up. (Woody Allen)

Every miracle in the Bible starts with a Problem. (Dr. John Maxwell)

Just because others have decided what's best for you doesn't mean you are incapable of deciding for yourself.

Try not to become a man of success but rather to become a man of value. (Albert Einstein)

There is only one success - to be able to spend your life in your own way. (Christopher Morley)

To avoid criticism do nothing, say nothing, be nothing. (Elbert Hubbard)

Failure is the opportunity to begin again more intelligently. (Henry Ford)

The proper response to difficulty is not to retreat, it is to prevail. (President George W. Bush)

You don't drown by falling into the water; you drown by staying there.

By failing to plan, you are planning to fail.

Success is getting what you want;

Happiness is wanting what you get.

(Dale Carnegie)

Minds are like Parachutes... they only function when open.

Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there. (Will Rogers)

Experience is not what happens to you, it is what you do with what happens to you. (Aldous Huxley)

Ships are safe in the harbor, but they were never meant to stay there.

It is not whether you get knocked down, it is whether you get up. (Vince Lombardi)

Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power. (Abraham Lincoln)

One of the biggest troubles with success is that its recipe is often the same as that for a nervous breakdown.

If you can't win the race, make the one ahead of you break the record.

The direction we are facing has a lot to do with our destination.

If you wish to succeed in life, make perseverance your bosom friend, experience your wise counselor, caution your elder brother, and hope your guardian genius. (Joseph Addison)

Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it. (Henry David Thoreau)

Success is going from failure to failure without a loss of enthusiasm. (Winston Churchill)

The secrets of success are a good wife and a steady job.

If you are not criticized, you may not be doing much. (Donald H. Rumsfeld)

A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and goes to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do. (Bob Dylan)

The gem cannot be polished without friction, nor a man perfected without trials. (Chinese Proverb)

A bad attitude is like a flat tire - you'll never go anywhere till you fix it.

Don't let what you can't do interfere with what you can do.

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work. (Thomas Edison)

Never be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the Ark. Professionals built the Titanic.

People of mediocre ability sometimes achieve outstanding success because they don't know when to quit. Most men succeed because they are determined to. (George Allen)

Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars. (Les Brown)

Success is how high you bounce when you hit bottom. (Gen. George S. Patton)

You can't get a job by reading the want ads; you get the job by going out and applying for the jobs.

Use what talents you possess: the woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best. (Henry Van Dyke)

Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it. (Henry David Thoreau)

The difference between a boss and a leader: a boss says, 'Go!' - a leader says, 'Let's go!'. (E. M. Kelly)

Good judgment comes from experience, and often experience comes from bad judgment. (Rita Mae Brown OR Barry LePatner)

Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall. (Confucius)

Everybody can be great... because anybody can serve. You don't have to have a college degree to serve. You don't have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. You only need a heart full of grace, a soul generated by love. (Martin Luther King, Jr.)

Any fact facing us is not as important as our attitude toward it, for that determines our success or failure. (Norman Vincent Peale)

We want to be rich, to be admired, to eat like a horse and be skinny as a snake. To have small children ask for our autographs, to be on terrific medications that make us calm and witty and sexy. To sing Irving Berlin and Gershwin and Porter at the Oak Room and be described as 'luminous.' But in the absence of all that, it's enough to be loved. (Garrison Keillor)

A successful man is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks that others throw at him. (Sidney Greenberg)

He has achieved success who has worked well, laughed often, and loved much. (Elbert Hubbard)

When it comes to the future, there are three kinds of people: those who let it happen, those who make it happen, and those who wonder what happened. (John M. Richardson, Jr.)

Sometimes instead of climbing over barricades, you've got to walk around them. (Bono)

The greatestest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do. (Walter Bagehot)

One man that has a mind and knows it can always beat ten men who haven't and don't. (George Bernard Shaw, "The Apple Cart")

Let him who would enjoy a good future waste none of his present. (Roger Babson)

My mother drew a distinction between achievement and success. She said achievement is the knowledge that you have studied and worked hard and done the best that is in you. Success is being praised by others, and that's nice, too, but not as important or satisfying. Always aim for achievement and forget about success. (Helen Hayes)

The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

It is better to have a little ability and use it well, than to have much ability and use it poorly.

Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossible before they were done. (louis D. Brandeis)

Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other one thing. (Abraham Lincoln)

I takes 20 years to make an overnight success. (Eddie Cantor)

When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, "I used everything you gave me." (Erma Bombeck)

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat. (Theodore Roosevelt)

To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone. (Reba McEntire)

You cannot be a success in any business without believing that it is the greatest business in the world... You have to put your heart in the business and the business in your heart. (Thomas Watson Snr.)

When you walk up to Opportunity's door, don't knock it. Kick that bitch in, smile, and introduce yourself. (Dwayne Johnson)

As for conceit, what man will do any good who is not conceited? Nobody holds a good opinion of a man who has a low opinion of himself. (Anthony Trollope)

The important thing in life is not the victory but the contest; the essential thing is not to have won but to have fought well. (Baron Pierre de Coubertin)

A Toast! ... or Several...

There are silver ships,

There are gold ships,

But there are no ships

Like friendships.

Hope for the best,

Expect the worst;

Life is a play,

And we're all unrehearsed!

May the most you hope for

Be the least you will receive.

May we kiss those we please,

And please those we kiss!

May your right hand always

Be stretched out in friendship

And never in want.

May your neighbors respect you,

Trouble neglect you,

The angels protect you,

And Heaven accept you.

Here's hoping that you live forever,

And mine is the last voice you hear.

May the clouds in your life

Form only a background for

A lovely sunset.

May the Lord make your love

Increase and Overflow

For each other and

For everyone else.

(1 Thess 3:12)

A toast to bread,

For without bread,

There could be no toast.

Do all the good you can,

By all the means you can,

In all the ways you can,

In all the places you can,

To all the people you can,

As long as you can.

(John Wesley)

Heavenly Father, bless us

And keep us all alive.

There's ten of us to dinner,

And not enough for five.

I could wish you good health,

I could wish you great wealth;

But your health could fail tomorrow,

And great wealth could bring deep sorrow.

So, I'll simply say, may God bless you!

(Theodore Roosevelt)

May you live as long as you want,

But never want as long as you live.

(Irish Blessing)

May the road rise up to meet you,

May the wind be always at your back,

May the sun shine warm upon you face,

And until we meet again,

May God hold you in the hollow of His hand.

(Irish Blessing)

Nothing is nobler or more admirable

Than when two people who see eye to eye

Live together as husband and wife,

Thereby confounding their enemies

And delighting their friends.

(Homer, from The Odyssey)

May your hands be forever clasped in friendship

And your hearts forever joined in love.

May those who love us love us,

And those that don't love us,

May God turn their hearts.

And if He doesn't turn their hearts,

May He turn their ankles,

So we'll know them by their limping.

Here's to beefsteak when you're hungry,

Whiskey when you're dry,

Greenbacks when you're busted,

And Heaven when you die!

May you have the hindsight to know

Where you've been,

The foresight to know

Where you're going,

And the insight to know

When you've gone too far.

May the Lord love us but not call us too soon.

To Life. The first half is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children.

To Mother and Dad on their wedding anniversary:

We never know the love of our parents

For us till we have become parents.

(Henry Ward Beecher)

May we always have more occasion for the cook than for the doctor.

May our house always be too small to hold all our friends. (Myrtle Reed)

Here's champagne to our real friends and real pain to our sham friends.

May you never forget what is worth remembering

or remember what is best forgotten.

Here's to your health! You make age curious, Time furious, and all of us envious.

May blessings be upon your house,

Your roof and hearth and walls;

May there be lights to welcome you

When evening's shadow falls-

The love that like a guiding star

Still signals when you roam;

A book, a friend - these be the things

That make a house a home.

(Myrtle Reed)

To our host,

An excellent man;

For is not a man

Fairly judged by the

Company he keeps?

May the road rise to meet you.

May the wind be always at your back,

the sun shine warm upon your face,

the rain fall soft upon your fields,

and until we meet again

may God hold you in the hollow of His hand.

Up wi' yer glasses, an' deil tak the hindmaist!

Here's to those who love us,

And here's to those who don't

A smile for those who are willing to,

And a tear for those who won't.

Some hae meat and cannae eat,
Some would eat that want it.
But we hae meat and we can eat,
Sae let the Lord be thankit.
(Robert Burns)

Here's to Cheating, Stealing, Fighting, and Drinking.
If you Cheat, may you cheat Death;
If you Steal, may you steal a woman's heart;
If you Fight, may you fight for a brother;
If you Drink, may you drink with me.

'Cheers', translated

Prosit (Austrian, German)

L'chayim, Mazel tov (Hebrew)

A votre sante (French)

Okole maluna (Hawaiian)

Kampai, Banzai (Japanese)

Salud (Spanish)

Slante (Gaelic)

Oogy wawa (Zulu)

Work, Jobs, and Earning a Paycheck

Always do more than is required of you. (George S. Patton, Jr.)

If you ever need a helping hand, you'll find one at the end of your arm (Sam Levenson)

Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired. (Jules Renard)

Whenever you are asked if you can do a job, tell 'em "Certainly I can!" Then get busy and find out how to do it. (Theodore Roosevelt)

I long to accomplish a great and noble task, but it is my chief duty to accomplish small tasks as if they were great and noble. (Helen Keller)

Work like you don't need the money. Love like you've never been hurt. Dance like nobody's watching. (Satchel Paige)

I CAN gets more done than IQ.

I expect to pass through this world but once; any good thing therefore that I can do, or any kindness that I can show to any fellow creature, let me do it now; let me not defer or neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again. (Ettiene De Grellet)

Making an honest living should be easy since there is so little competition.

Do all the good you can, by all the means you can, in all the ways you can, in all the places you can, at all the times you can, to all the people you can, as long as ever you can. (John Wesley)

Meetings:  A place where minutes are kept and hours are lost.

The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary. (Vince Lombardi)

A good rule of thumb is if you've made it to thirty-five and your job still requires you to wear a name tag, you've made a serious vocational error. (Dennis Miller)

Pray as if everything depended upon God and work as if everything depended upon man. (Francis Cardinel Spellman)

Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses, and some don't turn up at all. (Sam Ewing)

I am a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it. (Thomas Jefferson)

No one ever drowned in sweat.

Many people miss Opportunity because it is dressed in overalls and looks suspiciously like Work. (Benjamin Franklin)

Work saves us from three great evils: boredom, vice, and need. (Voltaire)

Everybody wants their ship to come in, but not many are willing to swim out and tow it to shore. (Priceless, Dave Ramsey)

When you do the common things of life in an uncommon way, you will command the attention of the world. (George Washington Carver)

God feeds the birds, but He doesn't throw the food into their nests.

If I want my dreams to come true, I musn't oversleep.

Don't let feelings determine your destiny. Most of the work in the world is done by people who don't feel like it. (Andy Horner, founder of Premier Designs)

Work brings profit; talk brings poverty. (Prov 14:23)

Respect doesn't come from the kind of work you do; it comes from the way you do the work. (Kenneth L. Shipley)

In a hierarchy every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence. (Laurence Peter)

Surround yourself with the best people you can find, delegate authority, and don't interfere. (Ronald Reagan)